Redneck Haikus

Coffee is brewing

I pound hard on bathroom door

I must brush my tooth

*****

Squirrels foraging

In the tall grass of my yard

While I plan dinner

*****

Seven gosh-durned dogs

Scattering throughout the house

My Chia pet died

*****

My wife looks at her

Best while wearing my shirt

Because of the holes

*****

The sun has risen

There is magic in the woods

The dove hunt is on

*****

My hair was long and

Gray the day before my wife

Bought me a Flo-Bee

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